I Love Writing, But...5 Excuses That Hold Us Back From Our Writing

As writers, we love to create. We love the feeling of putting our words on paper, of inspiring others or drawing out emotion, and that feeling of accomplishment when something feels “complete.” But sometimes what we love doesn’t quite translate into what we do. 

There are days, weeks, or even longer periods where we simply don’t make time for what we love. I waited years to begin writing again. It was such a long time that I almost forgot I had a writing voice in the first place. I made these choices despite the fact that writing has always been my favorite hobby and biggest talent. 

Sometimes we use “busy” as an excuse because we are scared or discouraged.

Sometimes we might be genuinely busy with work, family, or community commitments. There have been several periods when I’ve been in college or grad school working a job or two on the side. There have also been times when I’m working a full time job and adjuncting in the evenings. 

Sometimes, though, we use “busy” as an excuse because we are scared or discouraged. I know I am guilty of this. I mean, I made excuses not to write for 7 years! That’s almost a decade. But here’s the thing: I thought about writing. All. The. Time. Perhaps not every day, but certainly every week. 

Every time, I told myself at least one of the statements below. Here are some ways that I’ve figured out to fight these excuses (they were always excuses for me) and make time for my writing.

Not enough time

I’m too busy. I don’t have enough time.

This is probably the most “comfortable” fallback of any I’ve ever used to convince myself I don’t need to write. It’s definitely one of the excuses I’ve used the most. I have come to realize, though, that no matter how busy I am, if I can make time for just 10-15 minutes of concentration on my writing, it actually relieves stress. It doesn’t matter if it’s the worst thing I’ve ever written - if I get something down onto the page and it gets me out of my head for a few minutes in an otherwise stressful day, it’s worth it to me. 

No matter how busy I am, if I can make time for just 10-15 minutes of concentration on my writing, it actually relieves stress.

I have taken to writing at lunch on especially busy days. If I am in meetings all day or have an abundance of tasks to complete, setting aside 20 minutes (and putting it on the calendar!) to eat my lunch and jot down some thoughts is soothing. When I am done, I feel much more relaxed and ready to take on the rest of the day.

Setting a timer is also helpful when I am extremely busy. This works during lunch when I’m writing, but even more so when I’m at home. Having a time dedicated to something I love, even if it’s just 15-30 minutes when the whole weekend is packed with engagements and responsibilities is invaluable and refreshing. 

Family first

Family first. I don't have time.

First, your family is absolutely important! Especially if you have kiddos at home! We don’t have any yet, but from my limited experience, it’s a pretty crazy adventure to undertake, and you might not always be able to just set a 20 minute timer and ignore everything else. Pets and significant others are also a big factor. After a long day of being at work, your spouse might need some TLC. And, I don’t know about your pets, but my dog definitely needs some me time for belly rubs and such when I get home. 

You might not always be able to just set a 20 minute timer and ignore everything else.

What has worked for me with a husband and dog is to write when they are asleep. This could be early morning or late at night. Or, sometimes if they are napping on a weekend, right during the middle of the day. This is a way to get some “me” time in with my writing without taking time away from other family-oriented activities. 

The other thing that I’ve done is to make my little family part of my process whenever I can! My dog, Charlie, is the best little cuddle bug on gray days when I’m trying to make excuses not to write. He will curl up next to me and take a snooze while I get some writing done. I will often ask my husband a question (usually very random with a “Wait, what?” response) about whether something is plausible or believable. I think this could also work with older kids, if they enjoy being creative and like to try doing what mom/dad do. Help them get started on their own story, or have them draw a picture story. 

Inspiration

I don't have inspiration.

Whoa is this familiar! "I don't have inspiration" combined with “I’m too busy. I don’t have time.” is such a powerful deterrent - especially when you tell yourself that over and over again. I get it. Some people just seem to be overflowing with inspiration and always seem to be working on something different. And here you are with half an idea that’s barely even a whole thought. 

Hard truth? You know all about yourself and have unique experiences that no one else has had.

But, hard truth? You know all about yourself and have unique experiences that no one else has had. Even if others have gone through something similar, in the end, no one is you! So, start by writing what you know. Write about your experiences, the people in your life, the things you love (or hate), or even things that inspire you. Maybe you have something in your life that doesn’t “look” like an inspiration for expressing yourself, but it might be if you give it a chance.  

If you’re thinking that you’re still not inspired by your own life or circumstances, why not think about what you would like to learn? What big questions do you have and how would you answer those right now, at this very moment? How would you go about finding a better answer, if there is one? 

My life is boring

I don’t have anything to write about. My life is boring.

How many times have you told yourself that your life is boring and no one cares what small problems you have going on? How many times have you looked at someone else and thought about how exciting their life must be? Even if no one will ever read it, consider writing about your own life. You could do creative nonfiction essays, like my good friend Courtney, or you could fictionalize it like I have. You could even start a journal for complete privacy.

Writing down bits and pieces of your life will become valuable to you at a later time.

Any way you choose, writing down bits and pieces of your life will become valuable to you at a later time. I have journals from when I was a teenager and first time college student and it is a hoot (and most times quite dramatic) to read about my life and feelings at those points in time. 

What’s going on in your life right now? What hurts? What makes you happy? When my grandma died 5 years ago, one of the ways I learned to cope with it is to write about her. It was tremendously sad, as we were very close, but it was also cathartic. On the other hand, has anything great happened? Have you had a big milestone, made a life-decision, or perhaps even just made a new friend? Write about it! It will continue to give you joy even as the excitement fades.  

Not that good

I’m not that good at writing.

I hear this a lot from my students. For many, there is this constant nagging fear that someone will read their writing, which they are not confident about, and think poorly of them because of it. A note on this from a college English instructor: it’s probably not that bad. I haven’t read your writing (yet), but almost 100% of the time, it’s not as bad as you think. And, if it is, you can always add to it and change it! Good writing is not a one and done activity, it’s a process. 

I haven’t read your writing (yet), but almost 100% of the time, it’s not as bad as you think. And, if it is, you can always add to it and change it!

If you are inspired and passionate about something and you want to write about it, no one has to read it! You could keep a journal or write a story and keep it to yourself. If you want to write, you should do it. If you are that worried about it being “bad,” email me and we will talk about it!

No one should feel afraid to express themselves in writing because of something that someone else thinks. Believe me, in the long run, you will regret not writing down your ideas more than you will regret someone telling you it was “bad,” especially when it probably just needed some extra love and attention.  

Obviously these are not the only excuses we use. These are simply some I have found most common in my own life, have heard from other writers, and that students have told me when I am teaching. 

What are some excuses you have made or reasoning you have used that has stopped you from writing? Did you encounter actual problems or did you use them because you were scared? How did you overcome them? What did you do during times when you couldn’t overcome?

If you’re in one of those periods now, I’d love to chat and help you figure it out! Drop a comment below or email me at rachel@capturingyourconfidence!